Let me be the first to say:

Congratulations!!!

It's been a long time coming. Maybe I'll stalk the aisles of Barnes & Noble here in New York and do some of my own Lawyer Boy publicity.

Let me also be the first to express my regret. In college, you asked me out after Acting 101 and I said no. And even though we became fast friends, today I'd trade it all in for a chance to switch that monosyllable-word reply to a "yes."

Son of a.

Congrats again.

You should tape every morning show, daytime talk show, and late night show that airs today.

Then, you should do that Forrest Gump digital insertion thing, and make it look like you were in all of them. Your kids and grandkids will never know. I can see the dialog now:

Matt Lauer: "So, Dr. Sorenson, you're saying that polar bears are sick of global warming and are starting a cult that uses human sacrifices to cool the earth on the assumption that since people are 98.6 degrees, each person warms the earth with their body heat?"

Inserted Rick Lax: "Yes, the people at St. Martins have been great. My editors really helped me keep things tight and cohesive. I think any law student will enjoy the tips, and any lawyer will enjoy reading the book and thinking back on their own hijinx."

Matt Lauer: "So, Doctor, you're saying that the international child pornography rings are covers for the polar bear cult? That they use child porn to lure people into the 'To Catch a Predator' houses, but instead of being arrested, they are polarkilled?"

Inserted Rick Lax: "It's been quite an experience writing this book. I've had to walk a fine line between telling it like it is, and protecting the innocent.... and the not so innocent."

Matt Lauer: "Strange and troubling news indeed Doctor, thank you for alerting us to the impending danger."

Inserted Rick Lax: "Thanks for having me Matt."

CONGRATULATIONS  R I C K Y

It's now a few minutes before 1:00 Chicago time...how were the Foie gras medallions and with the mayor?
Sounds delicious and confusing.

Sounds like the Today show's gotten a whole more controversial...

Hello! I just randomly found your book at Barnes & Noble in Chicago (probably the same one you mentioned) and read the first few pages - it's hilarious! I plan to read the whole thing. Congrats on your book!

 Thanks, Counselor Leigh.  If you do read the whole thing, be sure to let me know what you think. 

Congrats on your first sale! Sounds like you REALLY earned it.

Forget studying for the bar, just hang out in book stores all day convincing people to buy Lawyer Boy!

Saw your book at the Barnes & Noble in the Viagra Triangle in Chicago three days ago. It was definitely the most eye-catching book on the table. If I saw any books with more interesting covers I would have flipped them over and put copies of your book on top of them. That'll show 'em.

I second the idea of studying at B&N locations and taking breaks to sell people your book. You could even offer autographs as part of your sale. Think about it.

Congratulations on your new release from all of us at LawTunes! Your book joins our CDs and all the other non-disparaging legal humor efforts out there which, in addition to making people smile, help them to perceive lawyers as less stuffy and more approachable, which means they may be more amenable to calling on us when they truly need our help. Good luck on the bar exam.

Hey Rick
Thanks for the book, I am looking forward to reading it. But I am must say ... I thought there might have been an autograph inside. Guess I will have to take my copy, head down south and find a bookstore where you like to study.

BTW, Henry, something tells me Rick might decide to go to B & N locations to talk people into buying the book and then, when that gets tiring, take breaks to study.

Don't residents get paid a decent amount of money? Not like six figures, but more than the average mechanic.

I didn't know that. Could be.

In other news, the CAPTCHA I need to answer to reply to this post is:

"1 + 0 ="

(If this reply comes through, you can assume I got it right.)

I'm telling ya, Rick. If I have to look at those feet for just one more day ....
Post something, boy! :D

Never before have I read something on the internet and felt compelled to post a comment. you fuckin suck. seriously.

 Please watch the meanness and the language on this blog.  My parents read this. 

I feel sorry for them.

I ususally post under "Anonymous." Obviously that wasn't me. How rude!

Not enough information...although I'm sure if you asked a bunch of monkeys, one of them would answer you correctly

Pretty sure I gave enough info...what else do you need?

How smart are the monkeys?

 average monkey smart

Is it 4 to the 50th power monkeys? The problem with monkey analysis is that it's not a complete random number generator. The monkeys might influence one another, after all monkey see, monkey do. Monkeys tend to pick "B" repeatedly because monkeys think that B means banana.

 Okay, counselor Pirates, I will hit up my calculator and get back to you.  My gut tells me your guess is too high, but we will see...

I bet it's .35*(4^50) monkeys. If you're only trying for 35% accuracy. But, I don't think it's entirely right because monkeys aren't random number generators. They're not dependent variables. If monkey-see monkey-do holds true, then they could very well all hit the same button each time (see supra re bananas)

What's up Ricky. You lawyers may be smart - most probably smarter than monkeys even ... but it looks like you need the help of a Financial Engineer with this problem. ;)

You'd need ~13 monkeys taking the test such that there is a greater than 50% chance that at least one of them scores 35% or better.

A single monkey has a score that follows a binomial distribution with 50 trials and a success of each trial of 25% (ie, 50 questions, 4 choices each question). This binomial distribution can be approximated with a normal distribution with mean of [50 * .25] and standard deviation of [sqrt(50 * .25 * .75)]. To get at least 35% correct on the test, the monkey would need at least 17.5 questions correct, which is 1.63 standard deviations from the mean [(17.5 - mean) / std dev]. A z-score of 1.63 or better happens 5.12% of the time [1 - (standard normal cumulative distribution function evaluated at 1.63)] meaning that a single monkey would score 35% or better with probability 5.12%.

Now we want to know how many monkeys it takes to get a 50% probability or better that at least one of them scores at least 35%. With a batch of n monkeys, the probability that NONE of them score 35% or better is [(1 - 5.12%) ^ n]. So, the probably that AT LEAST ONE of them scores 35% or better is [1 - (1 - 5.12%) ^ n]. We want this probability to be greater than or equal to 50%, so simply set this equation equal to 50%, and solve for n (consolidate terms, take log of both sides, and divide). Viola - 13.179 monkeys!

It's up to you to determine whether 13 monkeys is a comforting number or not. At any rate, I would guess there are many fewer videos of monkeys doing card tricks on YouTube. =)

Penn was also host of NBC's IDENTITY, a contestant on ABC's DANCING WITH THE STARS, and purveyor of a fascinating video podcast (http://www.pennradio.com/) (also, as delightfully self-indulgent as he is entertaining!).

No one knows BULLSHIT, or calls people out on it, better than Penn, so getting praised as NON-bullshit by him is QUITE an honor. Congrats, Counselor Lax, very impressive blurb!

I"m pretty sure they're bringing IDENTITY back. Good show. YOu watch?

I heard it was SEXY.

In any case, congrats, Counselor Lax. A well-deserved blurb.

You heard what was sexy?  I'm so confused...

I heard that it was sexy too!

Counselor Lax, read the post directly before mine and substitute the capitalized words. Then substitute the voice in your head for Justin Timberlake's.

Ah, yes, everythign is better in a timberlake voice.